Dosage!

I sometimes get an out of body experience because the amazingly talented anxiety-free woman I am was once a prayer and I very huge hope. Never stop believing in your dreams. Put in the work and sometimes the work is your own mental capacity and health.

Mental health is still a taboo, even though it is one of the most fundamental organs to a human being’s functionalism.

In late 2017 I went to see my GP because of my iron levels. Well, that’s what I thought it was until he diagnosed me with depression. Again here it was, this thing I’ve been trying so hard to run away from. It was almost a year after Mbu’s passing. In my mind I thought I was doing well. I had just found a job and there finally a light at the end of my grief stricken tunnel – but not without a normal drop of confusion just as about things got better.

I cried uncontrollably. I felt like a failure. Why wasn’t I getting my act together? Why was I falling to just keep it together? With no spouse to reassure me that things would get better, I cried until I felt I have had enough. A few months ago I had successfully managed to convince my psychologist not to refer me to a psychiatrist; so this diagnosis was my shadow. I couldn’t get away from it. I had to face it and live with it.

My GP put me on antidepressants that would help with the chemical imbalance in my brain due to the traumas that I’ve experienced. At first, I hated the thought of my life being monitored by medication; but that was because I was uneducated on the subject. Today I am enjoying healthy sleeping patterns. A healthy sleep ensures that I am able to fully function at all the roles I play. So in essence, thank God for the depo meds.